People Do Not Recommend - Funny Antisocial Introvert Tee
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People Do Not Recommend - Funny Antisocial Introvert Tee
The wearer gave people a fair trial. Small talk at the coffee machine, a neighbor's update on his gutters, the coworker who narrates her commute from the parking garage to her desk. Each one opened fine and was still going at the twenty-minute mark. After a reply-all thread with forty replies and a voicemail that could have been a text, the wearer switched brands: a dog that listens, a cat that leaves the room when it is finished, a goldfish with no opinions about anyone's weekend. This is the review, and it is final. The preferred social plan is canceled, at home, with the phone face down on the couch.
THE FINE PRINT
PEOPLE arched across the top in distressed collegiate block letters. One gold star, four empty ones. A typewriter review: started out OK, but then it just kept talking. try any other brand of animal. An outlined thumbs-down, DO NOT RECOMMEND in tall block capitals, and along the bottom, VERIFIED BY 8,309,828,865 (+/- 5%) REVIEWS.
Quality Guarantee
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ASKING FOR A FRIEND
Why do people talk so much?
Some talk to fill a silence, some think out loud, and some read a pause as a question nobody answered. Whatever the reason, it rarely stops at the first point. The listener usually finds out around the twenty-minute mark.
How to avoid small talk?
Ask one real question early, keep answers short, and carry something that needs both hands. Headphones help, even with nothing playing. Leaving before the second coffee helps most.
Why are people so annoying?
Mostly timing: hunger, a long day or a late train turns ordinary habits into offenses. Nobody is annoying in an empty room. The reviewer rated the product anyway and recommends a dog.